*This is a creative writing exercise meant to make the reader think. While it will talk about real world things, it does so in a way that is meant to be funny-ish, dark humor. One of my readers mentioned these joke posts can be unpleasant because the reveal comes at the end. We’re going to try doing it at the beginning now.**

AI has been used as a buzzword to milk investors for years now. It’s only natural that the tiny court reporting industry follow suit. After all, AI has never killed anyone or gotten them raped in jail. What could go wrong when we’re dealing with the accuracy of court records and the strength of meritorious appeals? After all, all trials result in a perfect verdict all the time. The system never goofs.

Look at how AI improved medical transcription. It made sure your doctor’s eyes are on that transcription during your appointment. What? You want them to examine YOU? Quality care is not part of the Leonard Green model of looting hospitals for poor people. Similarly, Leonard Green asset, Veritext, continues its push to lower quality wherever profitable.

From 95% in 2016 to 25% in 2020, technology is exponential, so there’s nothing you can do, just give us your jobs. Actually, no, just come work for us for less. Digital reporting is the future. You can just take less money to clean up our ASR. And that’s progress because then your money is in our wallet.

Look, even if you think there may be some quality issues with the AI stuff, it’s inevitable. These folks have more money than us. There’s definitely no world where court reporters make so much noise about digital reporting that the cost of advertising for digitals outweighs the cost of not being a scheming dickhead. No, that could never happen.

Give up and do nothing. That is the way of the “virtuous person.”

Si vis pacem, para bellum.

**So that whole private equity thing where the companies buy, hold, and sell other companies, it’s a cool way to make money. But as it turns out, my blog has been increasing investor knowledge too. Big box might not be able to sucker another firm into buying their company. This might become one of so many leads that turns into a big nothing burger, but stay tuned.

Addendum:

Following this post, a valued reader sent me this, showing the Florida Bar seems to be aware of AI pitfalls, and this, indicating that the FTC is looking at the potential power of the “Big AI” cartel.

Another valued reader pointed out the Taylor Swift AI controversy.